Disco Fever

So I was painting this morning (yes, I am still working on painting.  I'll explain later).  I had my ipod going and suddenly the Bee Gees, Bread, and Doobie Brothers started playing.  Before I knew it, I was creating a new play list and let it play while painting.

What does this have to do with my weight loss?  Well, back in the 70's my whole life revolved around disco and the emerging grunge and new rock era.  I spend allot of times at parties dancing and partying.  Not the kind of partying they do now, but a mild version of partying.  Anyway, the dancing and all was what kept me thin.  And as I painted and reminisced about the past and contemplated the future, I realized that as I go forward and lose the awful weight I have, that I will be able to do the John Travolta moves and even maybe look good doing it. 

Now, I am sure one of the first questions asked will be if I was dancing around painting.  We won't go there, and besides I don't need the International Seismographic Institute freaking out and looking for any earthquake activity along the Eastern Seaboard.  And it certainly wouldn't be a pretty picture.

Here's to the age of innocence and when we had good music!

What A Loser!

Even with the weekend being the way it was, I did well.  Meaning, I had a few things I should not have.  But I lost 4lbs.  I need to keep focused and concentrate on my goals.  This weekend went well, but I did eat some things I should not have.  It was a temptation that I gave in to.  Shame on me.

I am now fully committed again and moving forward and getting excited again.

Tested and Passed

I was definitely tested yesterday and today.  I had to make a special trip to North Jersey and we all know (those who truly know) about the food in Jersey.  It was a quick trip and I knew I would not be there long.  I left yesterday afternoon and got back this afternoon.  I passed all the deli's, diners, and pizza places and I was still able to keep my eyes on the road and keep going.

The reason for the trip was to get a copy of our marriage certificate.  Long story as to why, but it was necessary.

Back On, Back On, And Back On!

I am back on track.  Whew!  Was I ever glad to get my order yesterday.  And like Jennifer, it felt like Christmas!

Weigh In Tomorrow

I am nervous as anything about tomorrow.  I have to weigh myself in the morning.  I am nervous because I have not had my regular food and had to improvise for the last week.  I was careful, but I just an so nervous about putting on weight.  I worked so hard to lose what I have and I know it will be discouraging to see any gain.

I hope I can get past any gain and just keep focused on the end result. 

Sigh! It Will Be Here Tomorrow

I was getting itchy about food.  I finally ordered today.  Back on track and losing more.  It was not comfortable not losing over the last few days.  I am anxious to get back to losing.  I was nervous and afraid of putting it back on until I received my food. 

Well, it took some doing, but I made it through ok.  But still, it was not easy.  It was getting more difficult the closer I got to the end of this week.  I guess it was probably from the anxiety of running out of food and having to eat some of the regular food instead.  I hope it doesn't get that way when I go on maintenance when I lose the weight.  I wouldn't want to be full of anxiety.  God knows I am full of a lot of stuff anyway.

I went out last night to spend some time with friends who were performing at a local eatery (yes, that is me in the picture, but I wasn't playing last night).  As I sat there I noticed the food coming out of the kitchen.  Awesome dishes for sure.  But it didn't really phase me too much.  Even with the anxiety I was having it felt good to be able to resist the temptation.
Well, tonight is the night to start painting the living room.  Ugh!  It has to be done.  There is no way out of it.  Well, maybe there is.  I could say that I painted it the exact same color.  Or touched it up.  Or the color is different but with the new light bulbs it looks the same.  Hmmmm.

I'm Dreaming Of A Scrumptious,Soft, And Gooey......................

Is it weird that my fantasies now consist of this?  Shouldn't it be something risque or of white beaches or snow capped mountains?  (snowcaps, aren't those candy?) 

Maintaining and Losing....Huh?

I have gone into my mini-maintenance mode and unbelievably, I lost 2 pounds.  No complaints here.  I need to do this for just a few more days and then I will be back into fat burning mode again and losing like crazy.

I Am Certain I Will Be Fine

I have no choice but to!  It will be a challenging week for me.  Circumstances have dictated that I will not be able to order my food until next Friday.  So, I am going into a mini maintenance mode.  Instead of 5 &1 it will be more like a 3 & 3.  I think at this point I won't have much of a problem.  I have finally realized that it is either lose it now or lose sooner!  And I mean lose it all.  I worry about my future.  Not only over the next several years, but now.  Will I be able to lose this weight and get healthy soon enough?  Or is  my body about had it.  I really don't know how much more my body can take and it stresses me some. 
Being positive is most important and knowing that it won't be long before it is gone and I am going to to on the fast track to staying healthy.

So keep me in mind and send lots of encouragement over the next week.  I know I can do it and not be tempted to eat the crappy stuff.  But, we all have been there and we all know the longer it goes the more difficult it gets to get back on plan.

Being Tested

I am going to be tested tonight.  I am going to a gathering where there will be a great deal of food.  I mean, a great deal of it.  And all or most of it will be the bad stuff.  You know what I am talking about:  hot dogs, hamburgers, chili, chips, candy, potato salad, coleslaw, mac salad, and all the usual outdoor BBQ stuff.

I need strength and I need will power.  Maybe I should wear a blindfold and a nose plug.  That way I won't see or smell it.

Blog Name Change

You may have noticed I changed the name of my blog as well as the URL for it.  Long and short story, but nothing really important.  Same me and same story.

Good Day and Bad Day

Yesterday was a good day and it was a bad day.  We spent the majority of the day out hiking and enjoying the outdoors.  Needless to say, I sweated like crazy.  This was good and I knew the exercise was definitely doing me a lot of good.  We spent most of our time shooting some video and stills of reptiles and birds along the waterways and gandered into the woods a little.  It didn't take long before it was obvious walking into the woods wasn't smart.  Ticks are abundant this year and we knew we were going to pay.
We went to lunch at Shoney's and their menu was small and not much on it.  I had to order an entire entree' to get one piece of grilled chicken.  I also got the salad bar which I refilled twice.  It was more than what I was supposed to have, but atleast it wasn't junk food.  When we got home, I stopped at the grocery store and picked up some fish, chicken, and pork.  We did grill some fish last night.  So I had two lean and green meals yesterday.  I did not gain any more weight from it.  I think I might be justifying or rationalizing it to myself.  But, I did something I should not have and it slowed my progress.  So, lesson learned and will power is on the menu for me from now on.

Picking Up Speed

So I have been going strong for a few days now.  It has not been too difficult.  But I know there are tougher days coming. 
I was fortunate enought to have class yesterday, so that kept my mind off food for most of the evening.  The most difficult part about yesterday was trying to get all my water in.  I would find myself not drinking when I should.  But, one of the problems with all the water is the constant trips to the resroom.  And, in school, many trips is not too cool.  But, that is no excuse.  I did manage to get all my water in anyway.  Today is not a problem.  I have been in the office all day, so excessive trips isn't an issue.
We move on to today and then tomorrow.  One day at a time.

........in the beginning, it all began

Everyone needs somewhere to start. This is my "somewhere". Starting again is difficult. But starting again means another chance to get healthy and be happy. Yesterday (4/20/10) was day one of a journey to being the healthiest I can be. Although it is not my first attempt at this with many programs on my weight loss resume', it is time to stop fooling myself and start being honest about what is wrong. I eat for no reason, I eat to make myself full, I make excuses, and I knew better but didn't care.  There were times I had eaten till I was physically ill. Doesn't make sense. No more excuses and no more lies. Time to do what I have to and stop being someone I am not.

We all have issues with health. Whether it be weight, diabetes, heart problems, or things we could not imagine, there is one way to at least head down that road to optimal health. Take Shape For Life is one program that is fool proof and is the easiest program I have been on. Yes, I have been on it before and failed. But failure was not because the program didn't work, it was because I didn't work.  I gave up three (3) times when I started it.  You would have thought those involved would have given up on me as well.  But that was not happeneing.  My health coach had stood by me and supported me and never gave up.  She was always in touch and never once made me feel guilty or bad about failing the first three times.  In fact, when we would talk, it was about us and family and friends and not about the health issue.  It was brought up only when I brought it up.  Thank you Jane! Of course, I cannot do this without saying that there is one person who never gave up or even made my weight an issue and that is my lovely and beautiful wife.  Without exception, she is the most understanding and patient person there is.

Over the last 20+ years I have gone from being 190lbs to my heaviest weight of 372 lbs in 2009. No one knows better than I the problems with being over weight and unhealthy. I am always tired, run down, irritated, struggling to do daily tasks, afraid to go places, unable to do what others can do, not knowing when my weight would cause an issue that would humiliate me beyond anything I can think, and generally feel like crap all the time. I hate going out to eat because I have to ask for a table and not a booth. I cannot fit in a booth any longer and if that isn't enough to embarrass you, well, I don't know.

Regardless of the issues I have, it is time to get going and get healthy. It is a long road, but a road I must take nonetheless.

Please follow me on this journey of getting healthy and being happy.  It's a journey my life depends on!